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Question: Can you hit back an abusive parent?

Answer: One has the right to defend oneself (See A.R.S. § 13-404.) or an innocent third party (See A.R.S. § 13-406.) from an assault but does not have the right to strike someone to 'get even' or get revenge. (See definition of assault at 13-1203) Only reasonable force may be used to defend oneself or another. A parent, however, has a lot of disciplinary control over a child. Whether something constitutes abuse or assault, or whether it is allowable parental discipline, depends on the circumstances. If a parent is imposing lawful discipline, and the child hits the parent, the child may be prosecuted for an assault.

 

Responding with violence is generally not a good solution to the problem of abuse. That usually results in the level of violence increasing over time. There are alternative ways to get help, including making a referral to Child Protective Services or by calling the local police to file a complaint about the abuse. One can also inform another trusted adult, like a teacher, and ask for help. You can call 911 to contact the police in an emergency. You can reach Child Protective Services at (888) 767-2445, or (888) SOS-CHILD.

As a practical matter, when the police are confronted with 2 people who are fighting and who live in the same home, the police will arrest one of them to be sure the situation has a chance to calm down. Where there is an adult and his / her child, the police may remove the child rather than the adult, because the officer may believe the adult was exercising appropriate discipline over the child. Additionally, if the adult is arrested, the police would have to place the child into a temporary foster home while the adult is in custody. Therefore, the child frequently is the one who gets arrested, to avoid the need to place both the child and the parent in custody.
Comments
16 thru 20 of 22 comments
On 08/04/03
Kirsten from NJ said:
What about divorced parents- my dad lies all the time. He says all kinds of bad things about my mom because he wants me to live with him. He took my moms appointment for a parent teacher conference and told my mom it was canceled so she would look bad. He used to hit her and tells everyone she is crazy so no one will believe her. He moved and did not even tell her where he went until one day before our vacation ended then he told me to call my mom so she could pick me up. When she didn't call back he told me she abandoned me. He's the crazy one but noone will believe us because he
On 07/03/03
marie from IA said:
Katie you said blocking your parents well i blocked my mom from punching me and when I went to the cops with a black she told them I tried to strangle her which was totally not true so they sent me home and to find out now that I'm preg and there is no law that really saves me from this physco house hold I dont knw what to do she hates my fiance with a passion and wants him to die and I'm 17 and wanting out but there is no way that I ever could get to sign papers for me to move out so I'm stuck till I'm 18 that is 7 long months and I'm sorry but with a mother like I got I dont think I am going
On 03/24/03
Bernie from MA said:
We need to understand that the real problem is why there is no respect between the parents and a child. There in no need to hit a child when you teach him to respect you. You may be flexible with your kis; but you must make clear that you are the boss in your house. TO TEACH HOW TO RESPECT SINCE THE CHILDHOOD IS THE SOLUTION.
On 02/28/03
T.J. from IL said:
Why is it that if an adult hits another adult, you can be arrested for it, but adults hit their children all the time and nothing happens? Parents hit their children with belts! That is a weapon! What are the charges of hitting an adult with a weapon? Why do parents do this to their own children? Wives complain about their husband slapping them, and get devorced. But the parents hit the children with a weapon! Children are still developing emotionally and physically. There would be less depression and suicides if more parents were arrested for hitting their children.
On 02/26/03
Kyle from TX said:
If only it were that easy.
16 thru 20 of 22 comments


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