Question: What rights do stepparents have in the care of step-kids?
Answer: Stepparents have no specific rights over their stepchildren. The biological parent has decision-making authority over the children in all matters related to the child's health and upbringing. In other words, the stepparent can't consent to medical care, can't sign paperwork for school, etc.
A stepparent who has acted as parent for a child for a long time, and who is now being divorced from the biological parent, may have some visitation rights if a judge decides the relationship is in the child's best interests.
Even though the stepparent has no rights relative to the child, if the stepparent is a custodian of the child, that adult can make certain control / discipline decisions affecting the child in the absence of a biological parent. A stepmother, for example, who is taking care of the child during the father's absence on a business trip, can set curfew, mealtimes, and other rules that affect childhood discipline while the child is in the care of that adult.
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On 10/23/08
kimber from Othr said:
I am a bio mom and speaking in defense of other bio moms It is nothing personal to step moms. We fear replacement and no longer being needed. It is really hard to hear your children tell about how great this other woman is. You feel insecure as a parent when you have competition. I guess betrayed even by your own kids for letting this woman take your place. I know that is not the case but Feeling like that is perfectly normal. So maybe compassion for the bio mom in the side lines watching would not hurt.
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On 10/23/08
kimber from Othr said:
I have three children two sons and a daughter. I have been previously married and my e-husband was the father of one of my sons and took on responsibility of my other son. Whom is now 13. There is no biological father involved he split when I was five months pregnant and I stared dating my x-husband. When we divorced three years ago the judge ruled that he is responsible financially to a degree for him. He was ordered to pay one hundred dollars less per month in support than he would have to for a biological child. Also granted visitation.
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On 10/15/08
Roni from CA said:
Bob, that mum is a great ideal. I have a bio mother that does not leave us alone. everything is an issue, i have decided to take an active role in my step daughters life and hate the term step mom due to the evil imagine it has. So, i asked her to introduce me as co-mom... tell me why she is making a big deal about this? and her attorney is encouraging it?! step mom- co mom still mom in it! i dont get it. i love this child and my husband but this woman of 34 acts like a 15 yr old baby momma
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On 10/10/08
Bob from Othr said:
My ex and her mother abandoned my three children whilst I was interstate, we subsequently divorced and I got remarried to my dream girl who who had two boys whose father took little or no interest in them - all of my children are grown up now. My step sons worship me now and my own three children who have been poisoned by my ex don't even talk to me or my wife. I have not been invited to their marriages but I still love them. I love them all. I never use the word step - we are just mum and dad and I have the cutest granddaughters. You can't make people love you. I kept my rules simple.
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On 08/18/08
Jenny from AZ said:
BACKGROUND: 3 step kids, Mom lost custody due to excessive domestic violence. Both Bio Parents have joint custody because hubby & I agree that she is their Mom and the more people to love them, the lucklier they are.
RESULT: BioMom went psycho and I became the evil stepMom. Many people who posted here have experience the same insane problems I have.
SOLUTION: Everytime she does something against the Parenting Contract, I send a fax to her lawyer. It costs her $200 per fax & creates evidence to eventually terminate parental rights.
$$$ is a great motivator to improve BioMom behavior
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